Thursday, June 28, 2007

Irregular heartbeat + bloodpressure = ?



I am too screwed up.I went to class on Wednesday, and we just sat around and filled out our little fitness worksheets. Class was coming to an end and what does my instructor do? Gives us our final test. As a take home. So Wednesday night instead of doing my article that was due Thursday, I sat there for hours and looked up the answers to my 100-question multiple choice test. I skipped out of my Psych classes, thinking it would give me more time, but I didn't accomplish what I had expected to.Yesterday in class we finished up our work and portfolios and turned them in. I turned in my test, also, and the instructor graded them real quick. I got an 88 on it. S'alright with me, whatever. I should get an A out of the class.. I'll know by Wednesday. I skipped out of Psych again (seeing as I had been up until 2 the previous night and I was dead tired) and stopped by the bookstore on the way home. I was looking for an APA writing book, but all I found were stupid writing books, one of which mentioned APA on two whole pages. So I gave up and went home. Last night I felt sick.. it's one of those things where you feel like you're going to throw up and you have a really bad headache.Today my mom took the Malibu to work, so the guy from the car lot could come by and put the new plates on it. She woke me up at 7 am to ask me how to release the parking brake. It's amazing, but she made it to work in once piece.I woke up at 10:30 and ate and watched TV. After that I was thinking about the insurance company and I got so riled up and my stress level skyrocketed.. so I hit the treadmill to try and get my energy out. Then I took a shower and ate some soup and sat down to try and do my Psych article. All I have done is the title page. My heart just isn't in it at the moment.. Things anger me so much. Like *every* little thing. Shithead insurance companies. Stores that rip people off. "Popular" people who treat others like crap. Everything pisses me off and stresses me out and gets me riled up. I just hate everything so much. Another thing that stresses me out is money. I don't even have a job or any money. I worry about my parents, and them paying for everything that they do. I hate money. I'd rather be in debt and work at paying everything than feel guilty for my parents paying for everything and worrying where they'll get the money from.My dad still hasn't straightened out the insurance mess. Everything that affects me I have no control over. I'm the one being insured on the damn car, and it's all a mess. And I can't even call to straighten it out, cos it's not my car. So I'll just sit and wait for two weeks until my dad can get around to it.I feel like a total psycho stressed out nutcase. I feel like I go crazier and get more bitter with each year. Lately I've been super touchy and moody. I feel like I'm a bitch, especially when I talk to B and get all snappy.

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